


the only thing in the universe

by Prinzenhasserin



Category: Original Work
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-19
Updated: 2018-08-19
Packaged: 2019-06-29 17:25:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 529
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15734031
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Prinzenhasserin/pseuds/Prinzenhasserin
Summary: Paul, a bartender at the junction point in outer space, has to deal with a lot of heart-sick customers.





	the only thing in the universe

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Rosencrantz](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rosencrantz/gifts).



> This is a side-ways look on one of your prompts, but I hope you enjoy it anyway! Title is from the quote: "A dog is the only thing on Earth that loves you more than you love yourself."--which is a pretty debatable thing to say, imo, but I think it works in this case :D

“He’s just so beautiful, you know?” The patron at the bar declared loudly and sighed yet again, as if there was nothing he could do but think about said him again. He’d been sitting next to the jukebox putting in credits from more than one junction planet like there was no more important thing than hearing the collective works of Celine Dion.

Paul, who had never in his long life as a bartender seen an alien so obsessed with the dulcet tones of the most famous Canadian of the Milky Way, scrubbed the crystal jar with some more Kaliumstearat. He had learned during his long time as a person in public service that sometimes you just had to let people vent. He just wished people wouldn't complain quite so much about their significant others, or people they were attracted to. There was only so many times one could make vaguely encouraging noises and repeat sympathetic phrases before they sounded stale and over-used.

  
This particular patron was a regular, and as regularly as he came to the bar to drink a Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster and torture the rest of the patrons with the sweet sounds of sentimental ballads, he would expound upon the absolute perfection of his beloved. 

Paul had never seen the object of this ardour, but he assumed it was unrequited from the frequency of this regulars visits and the fact that he had never come in with him.

Paul would perhaps suspect him of making up his beloved, if he weren't so earnest about the entire thing. "I don't know, actually," he said, because his patron was still looking at him like he couldn't await his enthusiastic agreement.

His face fell; and suddenly Paul felt like the biggest jerk around. 

"I've never seen him, how am I supposed to know how beautiful he is or isn't?" Paul defended his words. 

"Oh, right!" his long-time patron said, cheerful again. "Wait, I must have an image somewhere--" he went into his bags and pulled out a screen. It was the work of a few seconds before he presented the screen to Paul, his antenna showing his pride. Paul saw the green hands of his patron first, then realised, "This is a hedgehog!"

"Yeah!" his patron exclaimed. "He has five thousand followers on social media! Such a handsome fellow." He scrolled further, and there was a picture of him driving a cleaning bot, a picture of him wearing the cutest socks, a picture of him on his patrons shoulders. They were all adorable.

The hedgehog was grinning into the camera, with a natural friendly face--Paul wasn't surprised that he was popular online, only that, well. "Would you believe I thought you'd been talking about your significant other?" he said.

The alien looked at him with wide eyes, then back down on the picture of his beloved pet. "Are pets not very important emotional supports in humans?" he asked, bewildered.

"He is very cute," Paul said, instead of going into the similarities his gushing had between other patrons talking about their romantic partners, and served himself a drink. He was never going to assume anything about anyone ever again.


End file.
